LISTEN | ‘Every day gets a bit better’: Lockdown grievers and givers come into the open

On March 23, President Cyril Ramaphosa ushered in a different way of life for all South Africans when he outlined the rules of hard lockdown.

Most assumed that once the initial 21 days of lockdown – with the instruction to stay home and obey “draconian” restrictions – ended, life would go back to normal.

But now, six months later, life will never be the same for many.

The reality of losing her parents on the same day to Covid-19 really hit 19-year-old Amy Volkwijn after the funeral service.

“Everyone went back to their new type of normal, and all the attention I was getting, the sympathy messages, those were all gone. Coming back home to an empty house without them, I think that’s when it really hit me that they are no longer with us,” the Cape Town teenager told Sunday Times Daily.

Barry and Heidi Volkwijn died hours apart on their 21st wedding anniversary in June.

Both had been comatose and on ventilators.

Barry, 48, was a driver at Alexandra Psychiatric Hospital. His 43-year-old wife Heidi was a well-known motivational speaker and manager of services for NGO League of Friends for the Blind.

LISTEN | Six months on: some lives will never be the same

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“Everything is so fresh and new. My parents have passed away about three months ago, and it’s very been tricky to handle my emotions. I would, however, say every day gets a bit better and I feel a lot stronger. I also have a lot of support around me that includes friends and family, who are helping me cope,” said Amy.

Amy’s life has changed forever.

“There is a shift in my living arrangements, as I would have been living with my parents and they would have provided me with the things that I need day to day, but now because they are not here, I made the decision to move to my grandparents. They look after me the way my parents would have looked after me.”

Mmule Nyakale, an admin clerk at Thelle Mogoerane Regional Hospital in Vosloorus, has lived in fear since March.

Covid-19 had robbed her of many of her colleagues.

“My duty is to register patients from local clinics and private doctors. I open files for them. As a frontliner one of my biggest fears was contracting Covid-19 because most patients come to me undiagnosed, and that was scary. Before March 23, I never worked with a mask, shield and gloves on.”

“But after the family meeting that President Cyril Ramaphosa called, I knew that this thing was real,” she said.

She had tested negative but was afraid for her family.

“I am also a mother of two girls, aged seven and 13, and my husband has diabetes and hypertension; he was high-risk. For my children’s safety I took them to my mother, who is also over 55 and high-risk.”

“In July when I was on night duty, my mom phoned me and told me my eldest daughter was not feeling well. I drove home and took her to our family doctor. He referred us to Dalview Clinic because she had all the Covid-19 symptoms, but I was relaxed, I thought she just had a flu,” she said.

The 13-year-old tested positive a few days later.

“My heart nearly stopped. I phoned my doctor, and he ordered us to quarantine for 14 days, and assured me my daughter would be fine as they have strong immune systems. In a week she was doing well, but the whole family had to go and test for Covid-19."

Nyakale’s husband tested positive.

“I felt so guilty thinking that I had infected my family, but it turns out that my daughter got it from her cousin, who is in Grade 7 and had just started classes.”

Community activist Omi Nair was out of her home province, KwaZulu-Natal, when the lockdown was announced in March.

Six months later, her efforts have helped feed thousands of residents from Chatsworth and surrounding areas.

When she returned home from Mpumalanga, Nair used the network reach of her healthy eating lifestyle group on social media to raise funds from all over the world.

“We heard about relief programmes which were set up by government, but unfortunately nothing was reaching the poor communities and we realised why when the president announced that councillors have stolen the hampers and are under investigation. The pain was real, the desperation was real, and the list appealing for assistance was growing longer every hour.”

“Our first drive was two weeks after we entered lockdown level 5, and we reached 120 families with the help of a corporate sponsor who contributed cooking oil, rice and soap. They were so impressed with our drive that we were challenged to double the number to 240 hampers and they were to match the number with oil, rice and soap,” said Nair.

But despite the good intentions, there were several snags, including having more beneficiary requests than hampers and being hit with a R30,000 bill for groceries that had been promised by a sponsor. 

“We were dumbstruck, demotivated and disillusioned. People were starving. Parents were drinking water and going to bed, and they kept the few slices of bread they had for their children. We were told some parents were boiling grass, added sugar and were feeding their children this to numb their hunger pangs.”

Thankfully, one of her members from Perth, Australia, covered the cost and, with donations from Canada, local family and friends they were able to provide food hampers for hundreds of families.

“We wish that we can erase 2020 as the loss of friends, family and colleagues was devastating. There are lessons to be learnt from Covid-19 if we are prepared to take heed. The lesson I have learnt is that we can do with so much less, we can take control of our lives, and the choices we make will determine where we want to find ourselves in the future. Wipe the slate clean, refocus, review and reflect and make those changes today as Covid-19 is here to stay for another good few years.”

Botanist Suvarna Parbhoo Mohan has not been to the office since the lockdown was announced in March.

Her company, the National Biodiversity Citizen Science Programme, is now creating a work-from-home policy.

“My office is in Musgrave, though I spend most of spring and summer in natural areas, as my job entails surveying plants of conservation concern. I have a routine and don’t require much space as I work off my laptop, external hard-drive and notebook,” she said.

Parbhoo Mohan has enjoyed working from home.

“Mostly uninterrupted time allowed me to focus on conceptualising new projects, strategise on how to evolve our programme and streamline activities, as well as participate and present in an international virtual conference. The various virtual platforms have kept me connected. I’m much more focused at home as there is no traffic to be concerned with – a major factor when you are in the northern or southern suburbs,” she said.